1. A 2-fer of both Ian McCulloch‘s solo albums on Sire, each with bonus tracks.
2. A 2-disc set of Electrafixion‘s lone album which includes a myriad of B-sides, remixes, and live tracks…and, no, it is not overkill, thank you very much.
3. Magnitude, a complete collection of The Wild Swans‘ recordings for Sire Records, each with bonus tracks. (And if you don’t know who The Wild Swans were, read up on them here, then go buy this set.)
Alas, the new Cracked Magazine – edited by Michael Ian Black – has been cancelled after only 3 issues…but, thankfully, Cracked.com will continue to exist online, so why not start in with your support by checking out their list of the 20 worst rhymes in pop music history. It’s not actually as comprehensive as the title suggests, since it leaves out America (“In the desert you can remember your name / ‘Cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain”), but it earns music geek points for including Steve Miller’s “The Last Wombat in Mecca.” Wow, that’s obscure…
THIS is supposed to be a list of the 200 definitive albums of all time…?
Please.
THIS is nothing more than a collaborative effort between a bunch of suits at the various major labels who want to sell some more copies of their back catalog titles rather than spend money on promoting new, up-and-coming artists, so they’ve teamed up with all the big music retailers and said, “If you stock them, they will buy them.”
Disgusting.
…but I think that if you sit down to write up your own “Top 10 Corporate Moments in Rock,” it’ll look a lot like the one compiled by the folks at Earvolution.com.
Quick show of hands: does anyone really like Valentine’s Day? For single people, it’s an unpleasant reminder that you’re single (and therefore, in the eyes of the good people at Hallmark Cards, a loser). For couples, it’s yet another obligation to go out and do something special for your sweetie, despite the fact that you’ve already done that at Christmas, your anniversary, Mother’s/Father’s Day, his or her birthday and, if you really go overboard, your date-iversary as well. Enough already.
While everyone at Bullz-Eye is either happily married or happily involved (except for our fearless leader, who is happily neither), we see both sides of this dilemma, and have assembled a mix disc for the lovers and another for the fighters. There’s plenty of joy and pain (but not sunshine and rain) to go around. Dig in.
Mix One: Ain’t Love Grand
Ah, love. Love rules. It’s a scientific fact that when you’re in love, the sun shines a little bit brighter, people are nicer, and your car gets better gas mileage. People in love, according to a song by the Feeling, get special treatment. They know of what they speak. And yet, so few truly great songs have been written about the subject. For every “We’ve Only Just Begun,” there are ten songs like “Everything I Do (I Do It for You).” Because of that, this is officially declared a Bryan Adams-free zone. Feel better already, don’t you?
“You’re the Best Thing,” The Style Council (My Ever Changing Moods)
Shameless homer pick, this one. My wife and I danced to this at our wedding.
“La La Love You,” The Pixies (Doolittle)
Because there aren’t enough love songs with monster drum tracks that have someone shouting “Shake your butt!” in the background.
“(They Long to Be) Close to You,” The Carpenters (Close to You)
Okay, so the bit about sprinkling moon dust is pretty silly. But this is one of the greatest melodies in the history of pop. Period.
“Here, There and Everywhere,” The Beatles (Revolver)
Picking one Beatles love song is like choosing to keep only three toes on each foot. My apologies to “Michelle,” “Something” and “And I Love Her,” among others.
To see the rest of Mix One, click here.
Mix Two: Love Bites
If love is supposedly the most wonderful thing in the world, then why the hell does it hurt so much? There’s an old saying that it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Try telling that to someone who has just loved and lost. From invincible to unlovable in seconds flat, nothing will make you feel as unworthy as a failed relationship, especially when it’s capped with a crushing one-liner like “I like everything about my life except my relationship with you.” My college girlfriend actually said that to me, no joke. And in return, I sang a number of these songs to her.
“House of Love,” Squeeze (Play)
I nearly put “Wicked and Cruel” in here instead – indeed, Play is pretty much one giant Dear Jane letter – but this song wins out for a laundry list of one-liners. “She was full of lies and boredom, it came as no surprise that she would cheat,” “I wasn’t Shakespeare, it’s simple / Did she expect me to kiss her feet,” and then the chorus hits: “We seemed the best of friends, life had just begun / But on the roof, a tile began to slip / The house of love caved in, and that was it.”
“I Believe She’s Lying,” Jon Brion (Meaningless)
Like Play, Meaningless has several candidates for this list, but I’m choosing “I Believe She’s Lying” for delivering the killer lyric with an even more killer drum track. “As soon as we’re committing, we’re admitting our mistake / So of course it’s only fitting, that the course we’re going to take is drawn / And whereupon, I’m slamming on the brakes.” You’ve all done it, and you can’t undo it. It’s the only way you learn.
“Say Anything,” Aimee Mann (Whatever)
It makes sense to put Brion and Mann back to back, since they used to date and he produced her first three solo records (plus she co-wrote the lyrics to “I Believe She’s Lying”). Was she talking about him when she said, “If you were everything you say, things would be different today / I would be happy to believe / But I’d have to be much more naive”?
“Good Luck,” Basement Jaxx w/ Lisa Kekaula (Kish Kash)
The flip side to “Ice Cream.” It’s angry, defiant, and there isn’t a woman alive who doesn’t love this song. “Good luck in your new bed / Enjoy your nightmares, honey, while you’re resting your head.” And hot DAMN, can Kekaula sing.
To see the rest of Mix Two, click here.
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