Category: Artists (Page 167 of 262)

Madonna: “Do as I say, not as I do”

In a recent interview, the Material Girl expressed concern about her daughter Lourdes’s tendency to wear jeans that are “so tight she can’t bend her knees,” and that are a bit too revealing in the rear whenever little Lola bends over.
That’s right: Madonna is worried about her daughter dressing a bit too much “Boy Toy” and not enough “Like a Virgin.”

Of course, whenever Madonna brings up issues of appropriate attire with her daughter, Lourdes simply laughs, hands her mother a copy of Madonna’s “Sex” photo book, and asks if she can borrow Mom’s cone-shaped bra.

Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha…!!!!!

That Van Halen reunion tour…? According to RollingStone.com, it’s already over before it even began.

Why…? Well, no one seems to know for sure yet – or if they do, they ain’t talking – but here are our best guesses:

1) David Lee Roth and Eddie Valen Halen got into one of their inevitable arguments, it led to hair-pulling, and when Eddie pulled off DLR’s toupee, Diamond Dave started crying and left.

2) David Lee Roth’s vocals are nowhere near what they were in the band’s heyday, and Eddie couldn’t kid himself anymore that they were gonna suddenly get better.

3) Gary Cherone’s schedule, originally packed, suddenly opened up, allowing the classic Van Halen III line-up to return to achieve the greatness that was so cruelly denied to them in the past.

Come on, #3…!!!

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