Last night the ladies performed on “American Idol,” and most of them were as bland as the guys were the night before. Not that it’s ever easy to predict who is actually going to win this thing, but the last two nights definitely proved that there are quite a few pretenders this season, despite the “best season ever” hype they have been stuffing down our throats. Like we did with the guys, here are the good, bad and in-between from last night’s contestants:

THE VERY GOOD

Amanda Overmyer has at least two other lives–as a nurse, and as a biker. And she’s an old rocker soul at 23. Well, singer might be the one tag we’ll all be putting on Amanda if she keeps this up. For me, it was hands down the best showing of all 24 auditions. She avoided the stereotypical Janis Joplin and instead took on the classic “Baby Please Don’t Go.” Aside from some weird scat stuff, she just showed some phenomenal pipes. Randy loved it, Paula said it was authentic, and Simon said he really likes her too. Well, I’m here to tell you…she was better than the judges gave her credit for.

THE GOOD

Alaina Whitaker, who looks a bit like Carrie Underwood and is also from Oklahoma like Carrie, is only 16 but don’t let that fool you. It was like watching someone ten years older…at least I couldn’t detect any nerves at all, and Alaina really had a huge voice, taking on “More Today Than Yesterday.” Randy said Alaina sang with conviction, Paula said it was great, and Simon said it was not only very good, but that Alaina appeared very confident. Good for her, and watch out for her.

Alexandrea Lushington, who kept correcting Ryan Seacrest about how to pronounce her name (whatever!), sang “Spinning Wheel” and was really pretty good. Here is another contestant that is only 17, and as Randy pointed out, it could be the “year of the young ones.” He also said Alexandrea blew the doors off this one, Paula said she looked confident and Simon didn’t get it. I usually agree with Simon, but I didn’t with a lot of his assessments last night, including this one.

Asia-h Epperson had a bad song choice with Janis’ “Piece of My Heart.” She is very talented but this song was clearly bigger than her. Still, Randy loved it, Paula said there were good moments and Simon said it was his favorite performance of the night so far. I didn’t agree with Simon on that, but Asia-h is super cute and hopefully will get to show more of her explosive voice with a better song choice next week.

Syesha Mercado sang “Tobacco Road” and aside from a bit of shouting, was pretty strong. Randy said it wasn’t his favorite performance of hers, but still powerful. Paula said Syesha is “fun,” and Simon said it wasn’t her best, but she is clearly one of the most talented women in this thing. Now that I agree with.

THE IN-BETWEEN

Joanne Borgella, the 25-year-old plus-size model, sang Dionne Warwick’s “Say A Little Prayer.” I think she should be saying a little prayer right now, because it was just okay. I do like her and think she has a better performance in her than that, so hopefully she’ll get to prove it. Randy said it was “pretty good,” Paula “liked it” and Simon said it was “average” and “cabaret.” It was definitely all of that.

Carly Smithson had a tough week, being in USA Today with all the talk that she once had a recording contract and album release on MCA. But there is certainly no harm in giving someone like her with a great voice a better chance at success. So she plowed forward, but I thought was quite pitchy last night. Randy said though that it was the best vocal of the 24, which I didn’t see at all. Paula said Carly overcame a tough week, and Simon said he “didn’t get it.” This time, I had to agree more with Simon.

Ramiele sang “You Don’t Have To Say You Love Me” and I didn’t get it at all. Still, the judges were tripping over themselves to drape her with praise. Randy said it was hot, Paula agreed, and Simon said that while he didn’t like Ramiele at first, she completely out-sung everyone so far. What???? Clearly the judges were tipsy last night.

THE BAD

Kristy Lee Cook kicked things off last night with a very karaoke version of “Rescue Me.” If that performance is any indication, don’t expect to see much more of Miss Cook. Randy said it wasn’t her best, Paula said something about Kristy Lee battling bronchitis, and Simon said it was a poor song choice and a robotic performance.

Brooke White did a very boring version of “Happy Together,” and it wasn’t nearly as dynamic as David Cook’s performance of the same song on Tuesday. Randy said it got better as the song went along, Paula said something nice, and Simon said it reminded him of a British dish detergent commercial from the ’60s. Either way, Brooke has a very good chance of going home tonight.

Kady Malloy, who is 18, did a pretty horrible version of “Groovy Kind of Love.” It actually was kind of Celine-ish….to which I say “Blech!” Randy said it was just okay, Paula said Kady showed no personality, and Simon said it’s like “a light went off.” Yeah, exactly. I’m not sure how Kady made it this far, except that she kind of looks like Scarlett Johansson.

THE VERY BAD

Amy Davis attempted Patsy Cline’s “Where The Boys Are,” and it was just awful…pitchy and very bland. Randy said it was “not great,” Paula said the camera loves Amy but she looked nervous, and Simon said it was boring and also echoed Randy’s “not great” sentiment. If there is a slam dunk this week to go home, it’s Amy.

So there you have it. For the ladies, I definitely see Amy Davis going home, and for my other pick, I’ll go with Brooke White. Kady and Kristy Lee were not good last night, but they will both sneak by on their looks alone, at least for one more week.

Tonight there is a grueling one-hour results show, and it’s more amazing each year to see how they can fill a whole hour with crap. Seriously, 2 minutes of meat, 58 minutes of absolute Turd TV.
See you all tomorrow!