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Okay, it’s by no means their best single, but it’s a damn fine one just the same, and the video is a certifiable hoot. My favorite part was the birth-school-work-death sequence in the second chorus (hmmm, that gives me an idea for a future installment). But what was with Jools Holland’s makeup?
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OK everyone, back to work! Christmas is ovah! What? I’m the only one here? Ah well, I have gathered together for you three fine clips of some of the worst musical crap you’re ever to likely see or hear! First up, it’s a terrible band tackling a terrible song - Europe’s “The Final Countdown.” Dig that Casio! Dig those vocals! Next up it’s a band doing some godawful original noise. The first couple minutes of setting up their gear is skippable, but once they get going, look out! Who knew that a trombone could be tortured in such a way? Is this what our tax dollars are going towards? Gimme back my moolah! If you’ve made it this far, congrats! (And if you’re clicking on this one first, shame on you.) Lastly, we have Jan Terri’s infamously crappy song and video “Lose Tonight.” I first saw this terror on one of the great TV Carnage DVDs, but it’s also online for so many more millions of people to enjoy. So enjoy it! Happy ongoing holidaze! |
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…then you’re also one of those people who generally waits until immediately after Christmas to pick up their Christmas music. I mean, after all, it’s invariably on sale, y’know? Anyway, here are two suggestions to keep an eye out for: Christmas with Dino: Thirteen classic Christmas songs as interpreted by that little ol’ wine drinker him. But what’s this? There are actually seventeen tracks…? That’s because the album is filled out by three bonus alternate versions of “Winter Wonderland,” “White Christmas,” and “Let It Show! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!” Okay, Mr. Mathematician, so you noticed we’re still one track short. Well, trust me, you’re better off skipping the first song; it’s a newly-created “duet” between Dean Martin and Martin McBride, and while Dean’s buddy Frank managed to do two albums worth of duets without actually sharing a studio with any of his collaborators, at least Frank was still among the living. This thing is just tacky. Christmas with the Rat Pack: But, hey, as long as we’re bringing Frank into this, let’s head into this collection of material by Sinatra, Martin, and Sammy Davis, Jr.. It’s 21 tracks, with one of them previously unreleased: Sammy’s “Christmas Time All Over The World.” Funny how there’s nothing here by Peter Lawford or Joey Bishop. Actually, no, it isn’t, come to think of it. (Have you ever heard those guys sing…?) |
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Now you, too, can understand why Norm Macdonald’s “Weekend Update” joke was so funny: |
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My gift to you: the video for Billy Joel's "She's Right On Time." |
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Looks like Jessica “DD” Simpson won’t be paying tribute to Dolly Parton during an upcoming show. She was slated to perform “9 to 5″ but screwed up the words, so the producers of the show gave her a second chance. She wasn’t happy with that one, either, and requested to be dropped from the tribute. Maybe they can make room for someone who can actually sing. |
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What is the Internet good for if not bringing everyone some holiday cheer? Well the folks over at Last Christmas have been busy seeking out any and all bands who have covered the classic (?) Wham! song and bringing the goodness to your ears. Frankly, I get pretty sick of Xmas music around the day after Thanksgiving, but a lot of people really dig it. There’s definitely nothing better than shopping in the mall and hearing 50 million different versions of all the Xmas classics in a few hours. Well nothing better until now, that is. Luckily, I have yet to hear “The Twelve Days of Christmas” so far in any form this year, and yes that’s including the equally overplayed Bob and Doug Mackenzie version. Bah, humbug. |
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How can things go from bad to worse like this? First Britney dumps K-Fed, and now she’s been voted as “Worst Celebrity Dog Owner.” Jesus, what a tough time Spears is having as of late! But leave it to the readers of “Hollywood Dog” and “New York Dog” to dog the dog. Oh, how me all miss Bit-Bit, Lacy and Lucky! But Brit-Brit and K-Fed gave them away to friends after two kids fell out of Britney’s torso. And she took better care of those dogs than those kids! At least she wasn’t dropping them and letting them drive. Such a shame. In other news, Oprah won “Best Celebrity Dog Owner.” Bit-Bit 4-EVA!!! |
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While we find it downright creepy that radio stations are flipping to all-Christmas-music playlists before Thanksgiving, it doesn’t diminish our love of Christmas pop. This list could easily stretch out to 30 tracks, but we will stick to the 15-song limit, if only to make it easier to justify our glaring omissions. We’re leaving off album titles because these songs are available on about 60 compilations each. “Fairytale of New York,” the Pogues w/ Kirsty MacColl “Christmas Wrapping,” the Waitresses “Do They Know It’s Christmas?,” Band Aid “Christmas Day,” Squeeze “December Will Be Magic Again,” Kate Bush “Christmastime,” Aimee Mann & Michael Penn “O Come All Ye Faithful,” Twisted Sister “Thanks for Christmas,” XTC “Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel,” the Cast of “South Park” “Donde Esta Santa Claus?,” Guster “Twelve Days of Christmas,” Bob & Doug McKenzie “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen/Medley,” Barenaked Ladies w/ Sarah McLachlan “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight),” the Ramones “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch,” Whirling Dervishes “Blue Christmas,” Collective Soul Filed under: Rock and Pop and Alternative and Lists and Playlists and Mix Disc Monday Comments: 5 Comments |
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Ah, Lou Reed. This is when Lou was bleached blonde and giving great interviews to the Australian press about how he didn’t take drugs but spent all his money on them. I wish he was still like this. Drugs were good for you, Lou.
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And, “Half the time you don’t understand the words…it’s just a beat.” Such wise words spoken from the young lady in the following clip that features holy rollers playing the same old rock tunes backwards and freaking out about the “hidden satanic messages” buried within. The main guy doing all this detective work says he used to listen to the radio. I imagine he used to drink a lot of PBR and eat pickled pigs’ feet as well. Dig it.
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If you’re curious to hear (most) of the songs I picked for the current Pink Floyd Deep Cuts piece, then head on over to Sniff The Tip and listen to your ears’ content. That is all. Happy weekend to you all. |
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The first two entries to my Covers thread involved more recent acts covering older songs (I say more recent, even though both of those bands, Simply Red and the Pet Shop Boys, debuted in 1986), but this time, we’re going the other way. I want old prog to cover the new prog. Rush made an EP a couple years ago called Feedback. On that EP, they covered songs that made them want to form a band in the first place. Bands like the Who, Blue Cheer, Buffalo Springfield, that kind of thing. To this Rush fan, that is a complete waste of time. I don’t want to hear Rush covering songs that are beneath their abilities: I want to hear them covering “Welcome to the Jungle,” “Silent Lucidity” and “Smells Like Teen Spirit” (don’t laugh, they’d knock it out of the fucking park), you know? Well, here is their chance. Muse is Radiohead + Queen, if we’re using “music math,” which means that there are at least two or three songs in their catalog that would fit Rush like an old pair of jeans. Tell me that Alex wouldn’t salivate at the thought of playing the guitar line to “Stockholm Syndrome” (it’d remind him of “The Spirit of Radio”), while Neil bashes his drums to high heaven and Geddy gets to justify playing both bass and keys in a song again. Come on, you know he misses it so. Watch the vid, and tell me that Rush doesn’t fucking love this song. |
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Earlier this year, I thought I’d try out Last.FM, which claims to learn what you like by tracking your listening preferences (in iTunes) and uses that information to provide a list of recommended artists. So I downloaded the iTunes plug-in – called the “iScrobbler” – and cued up my “Best of 02-06” playlist (as I was mainly interested in finding new new music). After a night of recording my tastes, Last.FM provided a series of recommendations, from “popular” to “obscure.” Two of the top recommendations – Belle & Sebastian and the Kooks – jumped out at me, so I gave B&S’ The Life Pursuit and the Kooks’ Inside In/Inside Out a few listens. The result? Both albums are on my Top 10 list for 2006. Damn computers. |
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Paul Libman got tired of all the bland Christmas music released by pop stars each year, and decided instead to use his Jewish faith and all of the great Chicago musicians that were at his disposal through his music production company, recording an anti-Christmas album of sorts that is all klezmer music. Once the novelty of the whole thing wears off, and whether or not you have any religious affiliation whatsoever, you’re left with an album that intends to be funny. And while it is definitely a bit humorous, you can’t help but marvel at the originality and the stellar musicianship. Most of the tracks (including “Joy To the World” and “Away in a Manger”) are instrumental, but there are vocals on Libman’s own hilarious “Santa Gey Gezunderheit” and on a Yiddish version of “Jingle Bells.” All in all, Oy To the World is going to make a great Chanukah gift this season, but Libman my wind up being surprised at how much those celebrating Christmas will enjoy it too. |
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