Hey, whoa, time out!
With all the goings-on in his life lately, it apparently just slipped Kanye West’s mind to return the Mercedes Benz he’s been leasing, now that the lease has expired.
Um…is this actually the best the gossip hounds can come up with on Kanye? So he forgot to turn in the Benz. Like the guy doesn’t have the money to pay for it…? The bill was probably paid within ten minutes of this story hitting the wire.
…VH-1 has decided to act like they care about music again…except it’s like they peeked into my brain and asked, “How can we focus on music and yet still create a show that the Mayor of Simpleton wouldn’t watch if you paid him?”
Ta-da.
That’s right, if you think you’re the next Eminem…or, more likely the next K-Fed…you can click here and enter yourself into the running to be picked for the network’s new reality show. Top prize is $100,000.
First rule of thumb: don’t suck.
Second rule of thumb: don’t trust your judgement, your family’s judgement, or the judgement of anyone who even halfway likes you already, because they’ll tell you don’t suck, even if you really do…and we’re pretty sure you really do.
Last rule of thumb: unfortunately, even if you’re a white rapper who sucks to the extreme, in the end, it really doesn’t matter, because you could still go multi-platinum.
Let’s all start lashing out at Oprah, shall we? Could be fun. And besides, it makes sense. So it goes as well with 50 Cent, who recenlt took a few verbal jabs at the boring talk show host in a recent interview.
“I think she caters to older white women.”
“Oprah’s audience is my audience’s parents,” the 29-year-old rapper said. “So, I could care less about Oprah or her show.”
Well, this is the first time I’ve ever agreed with Fiddy, but there’s always a first time. I reckon it’ll be that last, too.
Snoop Dogg’s in trouble again. No, not for making another terrible straight to DVD flick, but for causing a row at Heathrow Airport when he wasn’t allowed in a first-class lounge. Snoopy hurled bottles of whiskey and argued with the staff to no avail. Apparently no one at Heathrow gives a shit for the Dogg. Rightly so, too. I mean, if he was in Right Said Fred, he would’ve gotten in no prob, I’m sure. But the UK ain’t down with the chronic pimp, yo,
As if starring in Boss’n Up wasn’t enough, word on the street is that Snoop Dogg is penning a novel called Love Don’t Live Here No More that is due out in October. Hopefully his storytelling will be better than his acting, but I somehow get the feeling that it won’t.
The director of publicity at Atria Books says, “Books speak more to a female audience than his music, so these novels give [Snoop Dogg] an opportunity to show, particularly to his female fans, another side.”
What side would that be? Blinged-out cheeba-smokin’ pimp? We’ve already seen him do that. What else is there?
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