Author: Captain Capm (Page 84 of 118)

But it’s not like Church’s is that exciting, either. Still, the classically-trained singer who once wowed many Christmastime shoppers lashed out at Hilton’s new tunes.

“Paris is bloody awful. Honestly I heard a bit of it on the radio and it’s terrible.”

So says Church, who might just be acting like a snobby bitch herself, considering how much she flaunts her trained voice whenever possible in the press, and often pointing out how she’s the real deal and not some prefab crap when it comes to her recent switch to recording pop albums. The fact is there has been one Paris song so far that I’ve loved and zero from Church that I’ve cared for, so there you have it.

If you don’t know what I’m referring to by the subject’s title, kids, I’m talkin’ ’bout when the four members of KISS each released a solo album of their very own back in the late ’70s all at the same time. Well, now they’re going a step further by releasing their very own cologne and perfume. Ladies and gentlemen will be able to choose their favorite KISS member when buying the products, as the bottles will feature the different band members’ heads as bottle tops. Let’s hope Peter Criss fares better this time around.

Apparently the guys never watched the fine Penn and Teller show Bullshit!, because the products, including Party Shower Gel, Lovin’ Body Lotion, and Rockin’ Bath Splash contain pheromones, which have been proven to not actually be any sort of aphrodisiac whatsoever when it comes to humans. But hey, when it comes to KISS, they gotta throw it all in there.

Ah, and if that’s not good enough for ya KISS Army members, the band is also releasing its own denim line and opening its very own coffeehouse on June 27th in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.

It’s funny, but when kids and other folks bitch about bands “selling out,” KISS never gets mentioned once, and they’ve been doing it since people actually listened to them. Ha!

A duet between Chris Martin and Nelly Furtado was dropped from the latter’s new album because Martin’s voice was deemed “too rocky.” Wait a minute! Could this have been the moment Martin went legit and stopped completely with the wimp pop? We’ll never know.

Furtado says, “Chris’ label didn’t want his voice sounding so rocky, so they said we couldn’t use the song.”

Wait, though. Is this “rocky” as in “rockin'” or “shaky?” Doesn’t matter. Anything different from Martin would have been better than what he does currently, which is make yours truly instantly switch him off whenever his songs are within earshot.

At age 59 no less. Preston had had a kidney trasnplant in 2002, but the organ began to fail him and put the artist into a coma last November. My fave Billy single has always been “Outa-Space” b/w “I Wrote A Simple Song.” It was in a pile of 45s of my older brother’s and I grooved to both tunes as a young lad. I shall refrain from any cliched sentiments such as “Get back to where you once belonged, Billy. RIP” and other such silliness. I will even refrain from a “Nothin’ From Nothin’ Leaves Nothin'” sentiment. Man, I still dig “I Wrote A Simple Song.” Those horns in it pwn.