I don’t know who Saiah is, but his new disc Evolution starts off with a remixed version of a tune called “Nobody.” It doesn’t really matter, because this wannabe rapper doesn’t have a whole lot going for him. The mix on this track alone is atrocious, with generic squiggly synth notes farted out against a skeletal beat, both of which are mixed so low behind Saiah’s boring rhymes that it doesn’t even register as background noise. On the lamely-titled “H8,” we have to listen to yet another hip-hopper tell us how tough it is while hilariously bad synth cello lines mope around in the back. And when Saiah sings “Don’t walk out on me, baby / ‘Cause I’m about to be famous” on “Famous” while it sounds like some kid is listlessly pushing on piano keys, you just can’t take this dude seriously. So don’t. It doesn’t seem like anyone else is, anyway. Besides, you can tell the whole thing’s not worth your time thanks to the sleeve art that looks like it was made with the usual cheapo graphics kit available in the bargain bin at your local Wal-Mart. (April Fool Records)
