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Every music writer is a whore on some level, and I am a shameless, “2 Girls 1 Cup” skeezer when it comes to Muse. Look at the crowd. Who gets crowds fired up like that anymore? And the thing is, you should see them when the band plays “Knights of Cydonia.” Fucking incredible, that. Filed under: Rock and Alternative and Songs and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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Frankly, I’m surprised no one thought of this before. The LA math rockers Bad Dudes assembled one hilarious clip for their song “Eat Drugs” from vintage rock videos from the ‘70s and ‘80s. And for whatever reason, they included Information Society’s Kurt Harland on roller skates. Some bits are more of a stretch than others, but the Devo part is uncanny. Bravo, gents. This’ll get people talking about your band. |
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This is what Duran Duran’s Red Carpet Massacre should have sounded like. For those who don’t know the back story, Duran Duran solicited the help of hip hop overlord Timbaland and his protégé Nate “Danja” Hills to oversee their last album. This idea was sixteen different flavors of bad, because Tim and Nate demand that they be the stars of their work, not the bands singing and playing the songs in question. Duran Duran were reduced to co-stars on their own album. Tragic. The Midnight Juggernauts right every wrong that Duran made. The drum tracks are positively huge, second only to Daft Punk. The bass lines are fluid and rubbery – nothing on Red Carpet Massacre comes close to the bass line on “Shadows” – and the keyboards are layered without smothering everything around them. And here’s the best part: they’re a trio. That’s right, there are only three guys making all this sound, which I guess makes them the equal and opposite reaction to Wolfmother, and the dance doppelganger of Muse. Their album Dystopia doesn’t land on US shores until May 27, but it already has a spot on my Best of ’08 list. I haven’t been this excited about a band since, well, Muse. Make sure and check out the clips for “Tombstone,” “Shadows” and “Into the Galaxy” as well.
Filed under: Rock and Alternative and Electronica and Songs and Artists and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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It’s the oldest trick in the book: label is looking at releasing bone-headed debut single from new artist, worried that no one will take notice. So the label does the one thing that will guarantee some press coverage: they fill the video with naked girls. Call it the Buckcherry Effect, who did the same thing with their “Crazy Bitch” video and now have a platinum album hanging on their walls. The press release calls Saving Abel southern rockers, though we’re willing to bet that Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Allman Brothers might have something to say about that. More accurately, they’re a rock band from the south (Corinth, MS, to be precise), but this ain’t southern rock. Rather, it’s by-the-numbers, Nickelback-ish slug-rock, with one of the most unintentionally hilarious choruses in recent memory: I’m so addicted to, all the things you do Lest you think “Addicted” is just an overly suggestive love song, fear not; it turns out the singer kinda hates the girl he’s addicted to, and he apparently suppresses that anger because she gives good head. Two questions spring to mind: what does the girl get out of this relationship – other than the satisfaction of blowing said singer – and isn’t the lead singer worried that singing lyrics like this will cost him in the groupie department? Any girl he bangs has to be thinking, “Is his next song going to be about me?” On second thought, I can see women getting off on that, being immortalized in song, however denigrating. But that’s a whole different topic. And then there’s the controversial video (banned from MTV! Save the children!), which features a guy shooting video of two topless women getting friendly. Now, we are the last people to raise a fuss over naked women, but surely there is some angle, any angle, they could have taken besides the played out ‘straight girls pretend to be gay to turn a guy on’ bit. Even the girls on the pole/slutty groupie aspect of “Crazy Bitch” made more sense in context. Oh, and if you have not yet seen enough clichés from this band, check out the album cover.
Yes, nothing says “stupid whore”—or “Valtrex” – quite like a back tat of a band’s logo. Ladies, if you’re considering doing this, for the love of God, stop. No man will ever touch you again. Embedding for the video is disabled (it’s a Playboy.com exclusive), so to see the video, click here. All Saving Abel bashing aside, the clip is worth a look, preferably with the sound down. The video will run through March 18, at which point you will probably never hear from the likes of Saving Abel again. And yes, we understand the irony of promoting the clip in order to make an example of it, so don’t bother pointing that out. |
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All actors should make their directorial debut with a music video. It’s a good place to get your feet wet and learn good timing, among other things. And besides, if it’s good enough for Michael Bay and McG, it’s good enough for anyone else. Actually, McG probably should have stuck with making music videos, but that’s a subject for another column. “Little Lover’s So Polite,” the latest single from the unstoppable Silversun Pickups, has one Joaquin Phoenix behind the camera, and while the video is cute, I have no doubt that the label would have scrapped it had it not been directed by an Oscar nominee. The band plays the song from the back of a pickup truck (bad dum bum) while driving through downtown Los Angeles at night, with a parallel story of a young boy meeting up with a young girl, and running until they fly. The problem is that Phoenix has drummer Christopher Guanlao wildly overacting, pounding his drums to a rather gentle drum track. It is also clear that the band is getting a police escort to shoot the video – when the police aren’t visible in the shot, their flashing lights are – which ruins the illusion. Yes, we know that you need to get permits to shoot videos on public streets. We just don’t like seeing reminders of it in the video itself. Unless, of course, that’s the point of the video, like U2’s “Where the Streets Have No Name.” Not that any of this will stop the song from being a hit. It’s the fourth single from a 2006 album. That’s old school promotion, right there. God, isn’t it sweet. Embedding is disabled, but you can watch the video here. |
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My head tells me that I shouldn’t like Kerli. One listen to her voice tells me that she worships at the altar of Amy Lee – the song is smothered with Evanescence-style melodrama as well – and the lyric is straight from Alanis Morrisette’s notebook (“I know that you think of me when you’re beside her / Inside her”). But I find myself irresistibly drawn to the Estonian beauty. I feel like Oz in “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” when the band fronted by the female wolf comes to Sunnydale and plays the Bronze. He’s dating Alyson Hannigan, Alyson freaking Hannigan, but damned if he could resist the singer’s siren song. I’m Oz, Kerli’s the wolf. The wolf also made an appropriately creepy video for her brooding lead single “Love is Dead.” It starts with her horribly aged, standing in front of a CGI background that shows, well, death. As the video goes on, she gets younger, and everything behind her does, too. We get stuff from 20-year-old girls pitched to us all the time. None of it sounds like this. She’s not reinventing the wheel or anything, but you have to love a young girl with some depth. She covers Bauhaus’ “She’s in Parties,” for crying out loud. Hopefully the full-length album, which drops April 22, will follow up on the promise of this single. Embedding, sadly, is disabled, but I highly recommend checking her out. And in case you still need more convincing, here’s a picture of her.
See what I mean? You’re drawn to her too, aren’t you? Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to lock myself up in my cage, so I don’t accidentally eat anyone when the full moon hits. Filed under: Pop and Rock Babes and Songs and Artists and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: 1 Comment |
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We see them outside our office, angry people carrying pitchforks, torches, and signs that say “Limey Go Home.” Someone from Votefortheworst.com is at the front. People are jumping on the “American Idol”-bashing bandwagon left and right. And frankly, we’re tempted to join them. But not quite yet. Yes, we’re still mad as hell that “the public” chose Blake Lewis and Jordin Sparks over the clearly superior Melinda Doolittle. I, for one, have stopped watching the show after last season’s finale, and I’m pretty sure that if Mike Farley didn’t have to blog it for us, he would have stopped watching too after Mindy Doo’s ouster. Not good timing, then, for Randy Jackson’s Music Club Vol. I, where the onetime Journey bassist plays Clive Davis for a day and assembles a compilation album filled with the top of the pops. His leadoff single – whether he wanted it to be or not – is fellow “AI” judge Paula Abdul and her song “Dance Like There’s No Tomorrow.” It’s her first single in 12 years. Things have, um, changed a little since then. How will she adapt? Much to my surprise, rather well. Adbul only had a couple of really killer singles – “Knocked Out,” “The Way That You Love Me” and “Cold Hearted” were my personal favorites – so to compare this to the rest of her work is pointless; most of that stuff just wasn’t very good. This song isn’t great either, but it’s also not exactly terrible, which Paula should take as a major victory. Even more surprising is the video, which features some of the neatest choreography I’ve ever seen. The whole singer/backing dancer stuff has been done to death, but Paula does something different here. Most of the time, they move like a single organism. It’s pretty damn cool. The other two set pieces, however, do not fare so well. The shots of her with the band look laughably inauthentic. They’re clearly here so Randy can pluck a little bass, but there is just no way those musicians are making the sound we’re hearing (especially that ridiculous drummer). The other set piece is a close-up of Paula in what appears to be a wind tunnel with red drapes. She’s always looking to the left and right of the camera, as if she’s forgotten the lyrics and she’s trying to find the teleprompter. Not her best money shot. But still, we had every reason to expect something as god-awful as that Gwen Stefani yodeling song, and Paula delivered something that, if not genre-busting, is better than it has a right to be. So good for her. I’m still not watching “American Idol,” though. Filed under: Pop and Radio and Rock Babes and Songs and Artists and Videos and American Idol and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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Holy shit. I take back everything I ever said about this band. And believe me, I said some bad, bad stuff. From the band’s name (who the hell puts an exclamation point in the middle of their band name, besides !!!, of course) to their laughable, overlong, pretentious song titles – “The Only Difference between Martyrdom and Suicide is Press Coverage,” “Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have without Taking Her Clothes Off,” “There’s a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven’t Thought of It Yet,” are you fucking kidding me? – the band was a giant punch line to me from the word ‘go.’ And then, when I mistakenly found myself at their stage instead of the Eels’ stage at Lollapalooza 2006, I hated them even more. That last part wasn’t their fault, of course, but I blamed them anyway. At the same time, there were signs that the band was not quite the hackfest that I thought they were. The Dresden Dolls – love the Dolls or hate ‘em, they’re nobody’s bitches, which is a huge plus in their favor – shot a hilarious video featuring them trying to kill each member of Panic, something they couldn’t and wouldn’t have done without a) the band’s blessing, and b) thinking they were cool guys. So the Dresden Dolls like Panic at the Disco. What do they see that I don’t? Apparently, it is not what they had seen but what they had heard, namely “Nine in the Afternoon.” If the members of Panic at the Disco tell you they have not heard Twelve Stops and Home, the awesome 2007 album from the Feeling, they are filthy, filthy liars. “Nine in the Afternoon,” the lead single from Panic at the Disco’s forthcoming album Pretty. Odd (the band may have removed exclamation point from their name, but they are clearly still hung up on inappropriate punctuation), is that entire Feeling album rolled into one awesome song. It’s positively bursting at the seams with ideas, odd time signatures, and harmonies, harmonies, harmonies. It’s grandiose, magnificent stuff, but it begs the question: if they were capable of doing this from the very beginning, why the hell didn’t they? Sadly, I think I know the answer to that question: survival. Look at the extreme makeovers we’ve seen in the last couple years. My Chemical Romance makes their name writing snotty songs about how they’re not okay, but the second the label begins to believe in them, they make a Pink Floyd record (The Black Parade). Fall Out Boy, who’s been kicked around more than anyone, actually drew comparisons to Def Leppard with their last album (fuck you if you think that’s a bad thing). Panic, clearly liberated by these bands’ ability to survive on their own terms, decided that if My Chemical Romance can be Floyd, they can be the Beatles. Or Jellyfish, or the Feeling, or all of the above rolled into one. But here’s the scary question: are new bands afraid to be themselves for fear they won’t get signed, so they pretend to be some trendy, here-today-gone-today band for the sake of a contract, only to show their true colors once they’ve roped in an adoring fan base? Would Panic and My Chemical Romance have been showing their love for the Beatles, Queen and Pink Floyd from the very beginning had they thought it was an option? God, I hope that’s not the case, but it would certainly explain a lot. Still, better late than never, I suppose, so huzzah to Panic at the Disco for showing us what they’re really made of. I’m now dying to hear their new record. They even shortened the song titles this time around. Will miracles never cease?
Filed under: Rock and Pop and Alternative and Songs and Videos and Seen Your Video Comments: 1 Comment |
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Say hello to Atlanta rapper Rocko, who has apparently spent years writing, producing and developing major label talent (though curiously, the press release does not name a single one of these artists). He makes his solo debut with a song called, no joke, “Umma Do Me.” The press release goes on to talk about how Rocko is at “the forefront of the new Southern movement in hip-hop where business acumen and consumer awareness reign supreme.”
Uh huh. So that’s why he spends the entire video throwing Monopoly money at the camera? Or up into the air at the club? Because of his business acumen? Which is it, Rocko, are you a savvy businessman and phony playa, or splashy pimp with no fiscal common sense whatsoever? You can’t have it both ways, dawg. Guys who make it rain in da club are clowns, and eventually, they’re broke clowns. As for consumer awareness, doesn’t that just mean that Rocko knows what sells, and is pandering to the lowest common denominator for a buck? In other words, he doesn’t stand for anything more than making money. That’s not an example of business savvy. It just means he’s willing to whore himself. Now, let’s talk about the lyrics. I’m no hip-hop scholar, but I’ve heard enough to know that this is lazy, lazy shit. “I’m from the old school, you’re from the new school / My old school costs more than your new school” I want to call up Chuck D and read these to him, just to see how angry it makes him. Here it is, bam! Chuck would say, “God damn! This is a wack jam.” Now for my favorite part: the following line repeats during every chorus: “Wanna see how’s it done? Watch me do me.” Is this song an ode to self-love? If he’s doing himself, is that slang for masturbation? Naw, dude, I don’t want to watch you do you. Ah, but I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the comments on the video’s YouTube page (embedding, sadly, is disabled). Check out these gold-star props Rocko has received from his fans: “nigga killed sayin u might wife her i one night her killin it. do what it do” “This song is da shit! I just do me all day everyday!!Baby just rep yaself and where you from dont worry bout all des otha haters. they jus bitches” I, on the other hand, will side with the following comment: “haha do yaself bra! junior varsity shit nigga” Enough of this phony gangster bullshit, already. No one’s impressed. Enjoy the moment while it lasts, Rocko, because your moment in the sun will be fleeting and unpleasant. For everyone. Filed under: Rap and Songs and Lyrics and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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Note to Gwen Stefani: This is what your solo records should sound like. Kylie Minogue has gone to Number One in every major country in the world…except for the US. Here, she has two Top Ten singles (which are also her only two Top 20 singles). In England, she has seven Number One singles, 30 Top Tens, and 40 Top 20 singles. Forty. Here, two. Jesus. We really want to think that she notches her third Top 20 hit with “Wow,” from her upcoming album X. This is catchy as all hell, and Idolator summed it up perfectly when they described the style as stormtrooper chic. Was Daft Punk involved with this song? That EQ fade-out at the end certainly sounds like something from their Alive 2007 set. Give it to me, baby. Uh huh, uh huh. Filed under: Pop and Electronica and Rock Babes and Songs and Artists and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: 1 Comment |
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All kinds of Lily Allen-type buzz surrounds Made of Bricks, the debut album from the latest UK pop tart Kate Nash. “Foundations” certainly holds up to the lofty praise, though consumers should know that Nash and Allen, musically, have very little in common. In terms of their attitude, not to mention their tendency to curse like drunken sailors, they’re peas in a pod, but where Allen’s music is closer to Madness, Nash appears to be a bigger fan of the Dresden Dolls, if her song “Mariella” is any indication. But if any song is going to draw comparisons to Allen, “Foundations” is the one, particularly the line about her sucking lemons because she’s so bitter, and her responding that she’d rather do her boyfriend’s friends because they’re much fitter. Oh, snap.
Filed under: Pop and Alternative and Rock Babes and Songs and Artists and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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It’s the middle of January, and we already have a contender for Video of the Year. The beginning looks like a Sarah McLachlan cliché gone horribly wrong, with Alison Goldfrapp dressed in white lying on the ground in a forest, magic-hour light cascading down on her. Then she stands up, and you see that she’s wearing a white top, and nothing else. Suddenly, two leaf men sprout out of the ground, and the silliness begins. Even better is Dave Gregory’s appearance at the very end. The money shot comes at the 1:26 mark, when Alison lifts her arms Scott Stapp-style, and you’re pretty sure you’re about to see something you’re not supposed to. Of course, you don’t, but hot damn, is it a fabulous tease. Filed under: Pop and Electronica and Rock Babes and Songs and Artists and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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There should be a warning label with this video, something along the lines of the “Happy Fun Ball” skit on “Saturday Night Live.” - Those who are pregnant or may become pregnant should not watch “Alice” Simply put, this is not an easy video to digest. On the plus side, Mr. Melville seems to have gotten back in touch with his former self to create a dizzying hip-hop track that is equal parts Play and Everything is Wrong. Here’s hoping that the rest of the record lives up to that potential.
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I usually reserve this slot for new songs by relatively new bands, but since the music industry shuts down for a good two months at year’s end, we have nothing to promote but Christmas records from guys like Keith Sweat and Christopher Cross, neither of which I want to inflict on an unsuspecting public. Instead, I am going to take a cue from our local modern rock station, which has unveiled the top 2008 “most requested” songs in its history. The songs they’re playing are awesome, but the order of these songs, in all objectivity, is freaking ridiculous. Today they played Crowded House’s “Mean to Me,” which ranked somewhere around 1,200 or so. Now, I love, love, love Crowded House, but I don’t buy for a minute that the station has received that many requests for Crowded House, not for a station that began in 1990. For starters, they almost never play the band, and when they do, they play “Don’t Dream It’s Over” just like everybody else. If they actually received that many requests for “Mean to Me,” you’d think that they play the song more than once a year. Second, they played Radiohead’s “Paranoid Android” yesterday, and Alanis Morissette’s “You Oughta Know” the day before. Are they really telling us that they’ve received more requests for a Crowded House song, ANY Crowded House song, than they have for “Paranoid Android” and “You Oughta Know”? Not bloody likely. Personally, I think they take the entire lineup from 101 to 2008 and shuffle them, and I’m perfectly fine with that. It makes the first week of the year the most enjoyable week of the year. Hell, I heard Shakepeare’s Sister’s “Stay,” the Lightning Seeds’ “Pure” and Elvis Costello’s “Beyond Belief” almost back to back. How the hell do you beat that? I can only imagine how awesome this station would be if they actually played those songs (or Robyn Hitchcock’s “So You Think You’re in Love,” which I heard yesterday afternoon) more frequently. But hey, they’re still pretty awesome as modern rock stations go (they don’t play Evanescence and they love Muse, Kaiser Chiefs and Hard-Fi), so take the good with the bad, I suppose. But back to the video. The scene where Paul Hester points the trick gun to his head is more than a little disturbing now. Sigh. Filed under: Rock and Pop and Alternative and Radio and Songs and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: None |
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“It’s Christmas Eve, babe / In the drunk tank.” Find me a better opening to a holiday song than that. I usually use this segment to pimp new stuff, but ’tis the season, etc. (plus the labels don’t release anything of major importance after the middle of November), so I present to you my all time favorite Christmas song. Have we mentioned lately how awesome Kirsty MacColl was, and how much we miss her? We should just rename this site iheartkirstymaccoll.com. ‘Cause we do. Big whole bunches.
Filed under: Rock and Pop and Alternative and Songs and Videos and External Music and Seen Your Video Comments: 1 Comment |
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