Man-about-MySpace: Pac-Man fever

Welcome to the first of a series of blog posts featuring great stuff spotted on MySpace Music. It can be good, bad, and ugly. Or, as we’re about to explain, worse.

The NFL’s investigating whether or not
Pac-Man’s shield logo infringes on league trademarks.

Poor Pac-Man Jones. He goes on Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel to share his side of the story–translated loosely, in a few words, “I am not really remembering what Mr. Commissioner Goodell told me about keeping my nose clean. What was it he told me, again?”–and yet he just can’t seem to hold on to the headlines to save his life, because Mike Vick’s antihero PR machine is outflanking him at every turn.

But he persists.

Following in the steps of pro sports miscreants-cum-rappers Jim “Punky QB” McMahon, Allen Iverson, and Ron Artest, Pac-Man’s livin’ da streetz life with his National Street League rap label, a collaboration (coll-abortion?) with producer/henchman Spoaty. The raps are about–you guessed it–spending lots of money. “I spent a hundred grand all in one night!” they sing on the almost completely mindless “Yah Nah Mean.”

Just like Pac-Man allegedly did in Vegas last winter after the NBA All-Star game, when the most notorious of his myriad suspicious activities went down. Witnesses claim Pac-Man took nearly that much money into a strip club and was “making it rain,” euphemism for throwing dollar bills around.

Anyway, maybe if you’re a big rap fan and someone like Pac-Man is singing about poppin’ rubber bands off bundles of $100 bills, he comes across with some sort of street cred. Unlike a lot of rappers setting their stories to a rump-thumping beat, you know for sure that Pac-Man’s living his. The music doesn’t sound very good to us, but give Pac-Man some time. If he pops a few more rubber bands and buys some serious studio time, Mariah Carey and Janet Jackson prove that throwing the best technology at a recording really can help make a big hit, no matter what you’re starting out with. Of course, if he’s making records, that means he’s not working. And if he’s not working, the Titans certainly aren’t passing out more rubber-banded bundles of Benjamins.


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