Last night’s “American Idol” grand finale had few big surprises, some good performances and a lot of the usual fluff. And of course, Jordin won. Not that the entire world, including the African Children’s Choir, didn’t see that coming.

It started out with Jordin and Blake singing the Beatles’ “I Saw Her Standing There,” which was okay and kind of fitting since Jordin is 17 and the lyrics are about a girl being “just 17.” Then they cut to Gwen Stefani wearing a cream puff and singing her new single while on tour…that was random, and mildly annoying.

Then Kelly Clarkson sang her new single, and it was both angry and great…her raspy growl is in fine form.

Then they started with that “Golden Idol” award crap. The best presentation went to Margaret Fowler, aka Big Bird. It was funny, especially when she kissed Ryan on the lips, but other than that forgettable.
Then the top 6 guys from this season sang “Ooh Baby Baby” and Smoky Robinson came out to sing a medley with them….which was pretty decent.

Then it was a highlight of the show, as Blake came out to beatbox with Barry B. and Doug E. Fresh. Wow, I have no idea how they do that, and that’s what makes it so damn entertaining.

The next Golden Idol Award went to the most original vocal, and it was Sholandric, who I barely remembered from the auditions….yawn.

The 6 female finalists got to sing “Heard It Through The Grapevine,” and welcomed Gladys Knight to perform a medley with them. Tony Bennett was welcomed back after that to perform since he was sick after his mentoring a few months ago.

The Golden Idol award for “Best Buddies” went not to Simon & Ryan, but to Jonathan and Kenneth…..those guys were weird but are so funny to look at. Simon’s reference of Jonathan to a “bush baby” was validated when they showed a photo of an actual bush baby.

Then Melinda got to sing with BB and CC Wynans, who she used to perform with as a backup singer. That was pretty cool. After that, Carrie Underwood came out and sang the Pretenders’ “Stand By You,” which she had performed last month in Africa for “Idol Gives Back.” It was boring, but then Clive Davis came out to present Carrie with an achievement award for selling 6 million albums. He also mentioned that Chris Daugthry’s album has sold 2.5 million. Wow.

Then came the African Children’s Choir, and they were great, but they followed that with Sanjaya singing “You Really Got Me,” complete with Joe Perry on guitar and crying girls in the audience. Green Day then sang John Lennon’s “Working Class Hero,” and it was kind of bland.

Taylor Hicks sang “Heaven Knows,” and it was okay. Are you sensing a pattern here? The whole show had a pretty bland theme.

Jordin and Ruben Studdard sang a duet together, and it was actually pretty good….though Ruben stood five feet away from Jordin for fear of knocking her over.

After that, Bette Midler came out and sang “Wind Beneath My Wings,” one of the sappiest songs of all time. It really wasn’t very good either, and I wish she would have sang “Rachelle Rachelle” instead.

Then came the Sgt. Pepper tribute, with all of the past champs except Fantasia contributing. Where was she anyway? Anyway, it was okay except for Carrie Underwood singing “She’s Leaving Home”….ugh, nothing like butchering a classic.

Finally it was the moment of truth…..the judges all but proclaimed Jordin the champ, and then Ryan made it official. Blake, you just couldn’t measure up with that sappy ballad. And since Jordin’s dad is a former New York Football Giant, I’m hoping her win is a good omen for my G-men this fall. Hey, I had to say it.

Folks, it’s been fun recapping this season with you…..by the time we meet again in January, Melinda will have out-sold both Blake and Jordin and we’ll be saying that it really doesn’t matter who wins this thing. Have a great summer everyone…..