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Here’s two of my fave Rolling Stones tracks brought to you via the power of ancient music video. We have here “Hey Negrita” from Black and Blue and the fine cover of “Ain’t Too Proud To Beg” from It’s Only Rock And Roll.
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An entire wedding party does the dance sequence to Michael Jackson’s “Thriller.” The camera wasn’t in the best place, and a couple of the fringe dancers are stiff as boards, but hot damn, this is awesome.
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Bad times for Brandy. Looks like the singer/actress has been hit with a $50 million lawsuit due to a vehicular manslaughter charge. Brandy had recently struck Awatef Aboudihaj’s Honda with her Land Rover. The Honda then hit another car and then slid into the center divider, only to be struck again by another car. All this because traffic had slowed down and Brandy was obviously not paying attention. Way to go. Celebs and cars just don’t mix. |
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Somehow, some way, Fox spared us by making “American Idol” one hour long last night. Having that extra hour unexpectedly was like finding a $50 bill on the street. I won’t question why, I’ll say “Thank You” to Fox for letting me get back to Rick Reilly’s “Who’s Your Caddy?” a bit earlier. Great book, by the way, that all of you golfers or Reilly fans should read. Let me start by saying that Paula Abdul is messed up. It took us two weeks to see that drunk, disorderly Paula we’ve come to know and love, but she made an appearance. On the second day of the Birmingham audtions, Paula reportedly had to return home for a family obligation. Just a hunch, but I think that obligation was with her big brother, Tequila Abdul. With only an hour to show the auditions in Birmingham (the city that brought us Idol faves like Taylor Hicks, Ruben Studdard and Bo Bice), only five of the really talented contestants’ entries were aired. Katie Bernard was the first of those, and while she sounded like a 3-year old when she spoke, she was all woman when she sang. This kind of disturbed Simon Cowell, but Paula and Randy voted her through to Hollywood. Then there was young Tatiana from Atlanta. Have you ever woken up with the feeling you’re going to eat fried chicken, and then hours later found yourself in the KFC drive thru? I had that feeling about Tatiana when she was being interviewed, before she even sang. Like, this girl is going to be an awesome singer. And folks, I do have the gift of ESP. She was, as Randy declared, “a natural.” Maybe like Paris Bennett last season, and definitely top 12 material. Bernard, who sang Michael Jackson’s “Rock With You,” was awesome, but Paula somehow thought he was off-key. Uh, Paula, the only thing off-key is the ringing in your ears from that bender. Jamie Lee, a cute 16 year old blonde chick, matter of factly stated that her “daddy” is paralyzed, because he shot himself after catching his ex-wife cheating on him. How heartwarming. Somehow, this girl is unfazed by her home situation, and sang well enough to advance. This chubby dude Chris, who described his look as a cross between Jack Black and Jack Osborne, was hilarious. When asked why he was there, he replied,” Because I want to make David Hasselhoff cry.” That was reference to when Hasselhoff was spotted in the audience teary-eyed during last season’s show. Props to this kid. But he could sing too, and mark my words, Chris is a dark horse to go really far. As always, there were a few duds. I mean, that’s what drives ratings, so here is a glimpse into last night’s train wrecks…. Erica, a cute blonde from Auburn, was so off key it was painful. But to make things worse, she kept singing until security had to usher her out the door. Diana Warner, who was so round that she may have had a medicine ball in her dress, was also all over the place vocally. Then there was Margaret, who was literally dressed like Big Bird. Simon called it an “Easter Bunny Nightmare Experiment.” Need I say more? 18 year old Victoria had six foot long hair, but just an average voice. Lakia Hill, who led the league in off-key notes last night, was accurately depicted by Simon as one of the worst contestants in Birmingham. Then they showed a bunch of bad auditions that ended with contestants being gracious and saying “Thank you for the opportunity.” Talk about Southern charm. This wasn’t New York or any of those northern cities, where everyone thought it was their birthright to earn a golden ticket to Hollywood. Finally, Brandy sang “Like a Virgin,” and danced with stripper moves, removing her sweater to the horror of Randy and Simon. When told by Simon that it was a “rotten audition,” Brandy claimed that it may have been the way her voice echoed off the fake floor, so they let her step back onto the carpet. Still no dice. So then she was outside being interviewed by Ryan Seacrest and was bad-mouthing both judges, even calling Randy a “fat ass.” Wow. But hey, that’s good television. All in all, 20 contestants from B-ham made it on to Hollywood, and tonight’s auditions take place in Los Angeles, where a trip to Hollywood will mean a bus pass. See you tomorrow for the recap…. |
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According to an “exclusive” report from Us Weekly, “American Idol” producer Nigel Lythgoe recently contacted Courtney Love to see whether she’d be interested in “sitting in as a judge” on the popular Fox phenomenon. It’s likely Lythgoe was only inquiring about a guest-judge stint for Love…but rumors are now swirling that he is considering replacing frequently woozy, slurry-of-speech perma-judge Paula Abdul with the brazen rocker. These rumors can’t possibly be true — watch this clip for at least a dozen reasons why Courtney Love should never be placed in a position of prominence on a program that draws flocks of preteen girls — but they’re fun to think about, just the same. Imagine what might happen the first time Simon and Courtney disagree on something: I smell a new product placement segment for Neosporin, Ace Bandages, or Hollywood’s crack (pun intended) EMT squad. And just imagine Ryan Seacrest trying to say anything to Courtney. Anything at all. You can’t, can you? Because he’d never have the c-c-c-courage. One raised eyebrow from the former Mrs. Cobain, and Ryan dives behind that red Coca-Cola couch, quivering like a Chihuahua. So, no: Chances are, Paula’s drunken slurring will probably not be replaced with Courtney’s drug-addled babbling any time soon…but it would certainly make for arresting television. Literally. |
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You had me: Mariah Carey appears on the cover of - and in a layout in - the new issue of Playboy. You lost me: she’s not naked. Haven’t we already ALMOST seen everything Mariah’s got to offer…? Plus, I mean, good lord, this picture is on her official MySpace page…and that’s free. (If that link doesn’t work, here’s another one ; it doesn’t take you to MySpace, but it’s the same photo, I assure you.) |
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Gangway’s one of those bands who, as far as people in the States are concerned, can’t really be described as lost…because they were never found in the first place! And I don’t mean that in a “their albums didn’t sell well” kind of way; I mean their albums never got released here at ALL. Hell, I’ve never even heard one of their studio albums; all I have is a best-of disc called Compendium, which plays like all your favorite bits by the Pet Shop Boys, the Lightning Seeds, and…well, basically, any band you can think of that incorporates lush keyboard sounds into their pop songs. There are a couple of fan sites dedicated to the group (like this one), but they don’t appear to have their own website…possibly because they broke up in 1998. Nor do they have a MySpace page, not even an unofficial one, which is somehow even more odd, given how many folks tend to put up fan-run pages for their favorite artists. They do, at least, have a Wikipedia entry, which indicates that, in 2006, guitarist/songwriter Henrik Balling and lead singer Allan Jensen staged a reunion show at a small bar in Copenhagen for all of 125 people. (Oddly, keyboardist Torben Johansen was present in the audience but, the entry implies, did not participate in the performance.) None of the band’s albums appear to be in print - or, if they are, they’re only available in Denmark (and since I can neither speak nor read Danish, I may never know) - but, for now, you can at least enjoy this video by the band on YouTube. Conveniently, it’s for one of my favorite songs on Compendium. It’s called “My Girl and Me,” and it features such brilliant lyrics in its chorus that it’s inexplicable that it didn’t get released in the States: “My girl and me / We hang around in bars / And we’re usually drunk / But we’re never too drunk to fight / Like cats and dogs all night.” That’s genius. |
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It’s hard to fathom the outright anger over making innocent videos from found materials and posting them over at YouTube. But that’s just what I’ve encountered for the past few months regarding my creations “Viva Fat Elvis,” “Elvis Is Still Dead,” and “Don’t Be Cruel,” my “Elvis trilogy,” if you will. And even if you won’t, just have a look at the madness that is the comments section for the first two. There are many scary people out there, and they’re all Elvis fanatics. “Don’t Be Cruel” hasn’t received any comments yet, but I’m sure it will. It’s always just a matter of time. |
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I’m betting before it even happens. That is, Van Halen reuniting with David Lee Roth. It won’t be a “real” reunion, mind you, as bassist Michael Anthony will be replaced by 15-year-old Wolfgang Van |
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Who? Ah yes, “American Idol” also-ran Chris Daughtry has scored a #1 album on the Billboard chart. Congrats to Mr. Daughtry for continuing to prove that the majority of the record buying public like to be spoon fed their rock through a TV screen on a “Star Search” wannabe. Am I bitter? Of course not. I just know the real thing when I hear it. We all know what happened to “Bonham,” now don’t we? |
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Hey, if you’re not sure who’s been nominated for this year’s Grammy Awards, then Rolling Stone has a complete guide for you. Personally, I can’t recall the last time I really got excited about the Grammys. It was probably back in the early ’80s. I can’t be bothered to enjoy most of the nominees, but I’m sure someone out there is happier than a pig in slop. But really…where’s all the good stuff? |
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I had never heard this song before this posting, so please enjoy it heartily like I did. This is “She Needs To Get Some” by Ray parker Jr. featuring Father MC. The title speaks for itself. The visuals are strictly late ’80s/early ’90s crap.
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Not too long ago I recall discussing Rod Stewart with my older brother, and making fun of him for having such albums as Blondes Have More Fun on 8-track and other Stewart biggies of the ’70s like Atlantic Crossing. He revealed to me that he wasn’t into those things too much himself, but the chicks loved hearing it and it was a good way to get laid at the time. Ah, the ’70s. Nowadays you have to go to great lengths to get some easy sex, like lying to women in online chat rooms about your wealth and penile length. But I digress. Let’s now dig in to the greatness that is the video for “Tonight’s The Night.” My favorite moment has always been right after the first chorus where Rod put his finger up to his lips in a “wait a minute, there’s more to hear” move. What a cornball. (For the record, I think Rod pwnz on the Jeff Beck album Beck-Ola).
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Hank Williams Jr., he of Monday Night Football’s theme song fame, continues to be a badass pop culture icon whose influences span decades and genres. Williams is celebrating the 25th Anniversary of his classic track “A Country Boy Can Survive” with a remastered and remixed version of the song, and the track has already generated a quarter of a million plays on MySpace.com. Personally, I like the MNF song better, but this song portrays Hank’s longevity quite literally. Here’s a link to the song if you want to check it out for yourself. |
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New York City. The Big Apple. The Heart of Culture. You’d think the largest city in our nation would produce more good singers, right? When it comes to “American Idol” auditions, the answer is a resounding “no.” New York City had just as many duds as every other city on last night’s show, and just as many freaks. Let’s go to the videotape…. As usual, we’ll pluck out some of the talented contestants. Sarah Burgess, who made the trek from Ohio to audition, was extremely emotional after passing her audition….mainly because she lied to her dad and told him she was staying over a friend’s house for three days because he would never let her audition. But did you see her bawling as she called her dad to tell him the good news? If I was that dude, I’d be fearing the worst…like, “Dad, I’m pregnant and I’m in jail.” There was the cute Barbie-doll looking friends, Amanda and Antonella, who sang awful as a duo but separately had monster voices. Some of the other standouts were Jory Steinberg, the chick who sang “Chains”…I have a funny feeling about her, like she could be top 12. Then there was Porcelana, who they showed training every day for a year (ala Rocky) just to get in shape for this audition. But as the judges reminded her, it was important that she could sing as well. Lucky for this ball of spunk, she was good enough. Rachel, an 18 year old with opera training, tried to sing Jeff Buckley, then also gave the judges (which by the way included hit songwriter Carol Bayer Sager) a taste of her opera….all equally impressive, and as she pointed out, she can do it all, giving her the potential to go far in the competition. Finally there was Chris Richardson, who I think is this year’s Eliot Yamin (the Donnie Hathaway song gave that away), and Nicholas, who made the Hollywood round last year but flamed out when he forgot his lyrics. This dude is on a renewed mission, and he sounded awesome last night. Look for him to land in the top 12 of guys. And now for the moment you’ve all been waiting for….the masters of suck…. The first contestant they showed, Ian Benardo, was this flaming dude who sang “Gloria.” Dude had such an obvious New Yawk accent, that mixed hilariously with his gay dialect: “Cawling Glawria….” But what made Ian worth the price of admission was his blasting of Simon Cowell, asking Cowell to see his working visa. What a loser. There was Ashanti, who has a good name for pop music, but sang horribly. This was her third audition overall with the show, and she again showed why she just can’t advance to Hollywood. But to add insult, she kept whining to the judges and was such a drama queen that it was painful to watch. With only (haha) two hours, the producers didn’t have time to show us everyone, so they gave us a few clips of other duds. There was a guy in a spacesuit, a dude with blue hair, and a dude who looked like a girl (isn’t there one of those every season?). Nakia sang “Dancing in the Streets” and she was such a ball of energy that her enthusiasm overshadowed her vocals. When the judges asked her to sing a ballad, her flaws were exposed. Sarah Goldberg admitted that she was tone deaf, but thought that the judges should give her the opportunity to go to Hollywood and teach her to become the next American Idol. Are you kidding me? Like I can show up at spring training for the Yankees and demand that they teach me how to be a shortstop. Chris Henry sang a Kelly Clarkson tune and it was obvious that he would be better off with a dress and stilettos. My wife said it, and then Simon said it, as if on cue. Finally there was Isadora, whose real name starts with a “J” but one she would not disclose. Annoyingly, Ryan Seacrest kept calling her Julie. Oh, and did I mention she sucked? Paula called Simon an ass. Yawn. That’s all we’ve got this week, folks….next week brings the show to Birmingham, a city that has produced some “American Idol” winners and hopefuls like Taylor Hicks, Ruben Studdard, and Bo Bice. Surely this musical hotbed will put New York City’s auditions to shame. Well, one can only hope. |
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